From the Front Lines of The War on Men by Townsend Wardlaw
I have two stories to share.
Both stories involve people close to me facing an accusation of sexual assault.
One has a happy ending and the other ends in tragedy.
Two years ago, a close friend of mine was visited by police officers investigating an accusation he had raped a woman who came home with him two years prior.
This woman testified she had no recollection of the evening. She claimed to have been drugged yet a toxicology report proved this untrue. Because she did not remember anything that happened, her entire testimony was based on what her alleged rapist (my friend) allegedly shared with her the morning after.
Just a few months ago, my 15 year old son was accused of forcing himself on a young woman in her room, with the door open, and with her parents home.
While far from an accusation of rape, this young woman told her friends at school their ‘make out session’ was against her will and that she repeatedly asked him to stop.
My son was so ashamed and afraid of the social and possible legal consequences he refused to go back to school.
In the case of my friend, he was convicted of felony rape. Rather than face a mandatory 10 year seat on the sexual offender list and possible prison time, he put a shotgun in his mouth the day before sentencing and blew the back of his head off.
Anyone who has been called to jury duty knows the jury of his peers who pronounced my friend guilty represented people too bored or too stupid to get out of it. His (female) attorney failed to cross examine his accuser, voiced no objections during the trial, and convinced my friend not to take the stand to tell his side of the story.
My son’s situation turned out far better. The school’s administration (all women) rallied to support him. By the time we arrived at the school to meet with them, they had already spoken to his accuser and exposed her lie. They all personally committed to ensuring the situation was resolved and that his reputation would be restored.
The immense gratitude I felt came from knowing the outcome would have been quite different had he not been attending a $29,000 per year private school. At the diverse and politically correct public school I had pulled him out of two weeks prior, nobody would have even questioned the young girls version of events.
Both of these situations presented a powerful learning opportunity for both of my sons who will soon be going off to college Where women and some apparently insane men regularly insist ‘consent can be withdrawn from any past encounter that no longer feels good or safe to you.’
If you are a man or a parent raising sons you should be very afraid.
Society has already decided you are predator and has established an elaborate and effective infrastructure for proving your presumed guilt.
This infrastructure is also expensive and you will pay dearly for the privilege of proving (or trying to prove) your innocence.
The district attorney will take your accusers case for free but you will need to come up with $60,000 – $100,000 to bring your case to trial.
Regardless of how you view the state of our society, complaining about the situation won’t improve your chance of staying out of prison.
Instead, focus your energy on staying out of prison or spending money proving your innocence.
To accomplish this goal, you need to ask two simple questions in every situation.
How well do I know this person such that I am certain they would not change their version of events?
If you found yourself accused, how would you prove your innocence?
Of course acting on the information these two questions reveal requires some basic self discipline.
It may mean limiting your intake of alcohol or drugs enough to maintain good judgement. It may mean declining the advances of an obviously alcohol impaired member of the opposite sex no matter how attractive or nice she may be.
It may mean getting a number rather than going back to her place.
Of course we are all human and subject to lapses in judgement once in awhile so I’ll leave you with a radical idea: Talk to your friends about this problem!
You can start by sharing this article.
If you are in a social situation, don’t be afraid to run interference if you see someone in your crew putting themselves at risk.
The suggestion that “you should get her number, it would suck if she decided to say you raped her in the morning” is a powerful way to insert reality into the moment.
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