Giving up on your dreams doesn’t end the game. The game never ends. Poor health, job market declines, and old age are still coming for you. You can either keep fighting, which at least gives you a chance, or you can quit – which assures your decay and destruction.
Gorilla Mindset shift: Giving up is different from quitting. If you cannot be elite (or at least really good) at an activity, quit. Keep working until you find a profession you can become elite at.
Why shouldn’t you ever give up on yourself?
(You think you have a choice, but you really don’t.)
Breakthroughs often follow breakdowns.
Soldiers enter military training with often flabby and weak bodies and a lack of discipline. Each day they are pushed hard – to the point of “overtraining” even. Yet thousands of years of evidence shows you become something better after you have been broken down.
How can you know what you’re made of until you’ve taken yourself to your breaking point or even beyond your breaking point?
Failures make you stronger. (If you’re not failing, you’re not trying hard enough.)
Saying that you learn more from failures than successes is feel-good, self-help nonsense. You learn far more from winning than from losing. Whenever possible, succeed. Model yourself after successes. Win.
That said, failure is inevitable and desirable. If you aren’t failing, then you aren’t trying hard enough. You aren’t pushing yourself.
If you go to the gym, you’ll fail every time you train. Either the weight will be too heavy or you won’t be able to do another rep. What happens next?
Your body recovers and you return to the gym stronger.
Gorilla Mindset shift: Specific adaptations to imposed demands (the S.A.I.D. principle) applies to every aspect of life.
Once your body adapts to an imposed demands, you reach a point of homeostasis – a new, higher level of normalcy.
To take this “new normal” to the next level, what must you do?
Every successful person you respect almost gave up.
The first rule of Success Club is to never talk about your failures. The second rule of Success Club is to see the first rule.
There’s a dirty secret every successful person has. That dirty secret is a history of failed businesses, bankruptcies, mistakes, divorces, panic attacks, and sleepless nights crying in our pillows.
Once you become successful, you have to be Mr. Cool Guy. I always knew I’d succeed! Self-doubt is for wimps!
Get real. Success requires you to do that 99% of people can’t do or can’t imagine doing. Your entire life you’ve heard your ideas are unrealistic or you’re delusional.
(Or at least that’s what I heard!)
Learning how to swim through a sea of negativity and doubt takes years or even decades.
You can always do something new.
Skills are transferable.
I’ve waited tables, worked at Home Depot, dug through trash for cans to take the recycling center, detasseled corn, marched with a heavy backpack with bloody feet, been a lawyer, and on and on.
Everything I learned has carried me towards my current profession.
Hard manual labor taught me to never be one of those cry baby writers who cries about how hard writing is. If you think writing is hard, go dig a ditch in 100 degree heat or walk through cold wet corn fields at 4 a.m.
My dad did this at my age so I wouldn’t have to.
Lawyering taught me how to communicate clearly and to understand human frailty. Lawyering also taught me that while I genuinely enjoy helping people, you can’t help people who won’t help themselves.
Lawyers are seen as gods or white knights and quickly become despised by their clients when this illusion is shattered. Lawyers can help clients rebuild their lives, but only when clients are willing to put the work in.
Hence why I wrote Gorilla Mindset. This allows me to help those who will put the (immense) work it takes to better themselves without expecting me to be their lord and savior.
Reading Gorilla Mindset is easy. Applying it is on you.
There’s no alternative.
You might have given up on life, but life hasn’t given up on you. Father Time is still going to make that body of yours age. The stock market is still going to crash. The job market is going to take away your job. Your wife is going to leave you. Unless you take an active approach to life.
Indeed, think about physical health and fitness. You can say, “Going to the gym is too hard!” Yes, you can. Stop trying and watch what happens.
Does your body say, “OK, we’ll just leave you alone.”
Instead you lose your conditioning and muscle mass. You get fat. Your blood pressure rises. Blood flow to your brain decreases, causing you to lose IQ points.
The same occurs on a much broader scale. You can give up on the world, but entropy and chaos is coming your way.
The only way to survive and thrive is to live with audacity. Raise hell. Fight as hard as you can.
In the end, there’s no other alternative.