When you write about your life and share your experiences and vulnerabilities, people in your life will start to wonder, “Is he writing about me?”
Someone once asked whether an article was about him, I told him the truth.
“If you think my writing is about you, then it is about you.”
I could have told the fellow his exaggerated feelings of self-importance led him to believe people obsessed over him and that he should get over himself.
Perhaps I could have quoted some familiar song lyrics back to him:
You’re so vain, you probably think this article is about you
You’re so vain, I’ll bet you think this article is about you
Don’t you? Don’t you?
What I told him was true. The article was about him, even though I hadn’t thought once about him before publishing it.
What is the Law of Reflection?
None of us observe “objective reality.” What you see in the world is influenced by your own attitudes, believes, values, cultural programming, education, insight, experience, and sensory perception.
What do you see here?
I posted this picture to show money can buy happiness, even if for a moment.
A woman said the picture proved I was a horrible person. I exploited a woman’s suffering to elevate my own status.
Who is right and who is wrong?
Am I being real, or am I manufacturing an idealized persona?
In my mind, that picture reflects back the image of a man who wants to help others and change lives.
In your mind, the picture reflects something else back.
My critic is right. Her views of me were reflected back at her. I used a suffering person to make myself look generous.
My view is right. I help others, even when no one is looking or will ever know.
That is the Law of Reflection.
It is easier to spot flaws in others than in yourself.
When you find yourself annoyed with a person, the Law of Reflection is in action.
What has your friend, boyfriend, husband, wife, spouse, or children done to annoy or outrage you?
Have you reflected on your own behavior?
Perhaps you share those same flaws.
Or perhaps you feel as if you might, and the thought terrifies you.
If you say everything is a scam, does that mean everything truly is a scam, or does it mean you feel like a fraud?
Your emotions are reflected back at you.
There was once a website called Hot Chicks with Douchebags. The title speaks for itself, as it was a website with pictures of hot chicks with douchebags.
People saw a “douchebag,” but what they really saw was an emotion reflecting back at them.
Why do you care if someone is a douche bag? Why do you care if a random person on the Internet is a douche bag?
There’s a reason you care.
You feel jealousy, an emotion brought about by a scarcity mindset.
When you see a person who has something you desire, your social conditioning insists you lower his status by calling him a douche bag.
This salves your fragile ego.
You don’t actually raise your own standards or accomplish anything. Instead, in your own mind, as it is a fantasy, you bring someone else down to your level – the level of the gutter.
“Cernovich might have a hot girl, but I’d never sell out and be a douche bag like him just to get laid!”
When you feel an emotion, ask what is being reflected back at you.
Rather than argue, become conscious.
If you see something a person says directed back towards you, don’t start drama or argue or show the person how WRONG! they are.
Ask why YOU are seeing that reflection.
What does YOUR reaction to a person or situation say about YOU?
Answer that question, and you understand the Law of Reflection.