Your Environment is Everything

It sounds abstract at best and cheesy at worst to say, “You are the average of your 5 closest friends.” Or, “If you hang around 9 broke people, prepare to be the tenth.” If you want to appreciate that wisdom in concrete terms, do what I just did.

Go to a public library without any smart phones or note pads or computers. Resolve to stay there for 2 hours. Eat your carbs or drink coffee before going into there so you don’t find an excuse to leave.

What are you going to do?

The answer seems obvious. “Derp le derp,” you might reply, “I’m going to read.”

As with all hidden wisdom, you need to consider the implications.

You might read magazines or you might read light books or you might read challenging material. But you will be doing something productive. More importantly is what you won’t be doing, namely, you won’t be wasting time on unproductive activities.

I often tell guys to just go to the gym for an hour. “What should I do?”  Just go to the gym. At the very least you won’t be wasting money, eating fried calamari, drinking alcohol, or watching TV.

Going into a positive environment without any aim or goal is often the single most productive thing you will do all day. Consider why that might be.

If you want to meditate, you have to learn to sit still, say nothing, and focus on simply existing. Meditation is extremely challenging, right?

A human being has great difficult doing nothing. If you’re eating cereal, you’re going to read the cereal box even though that’s pointless and stupid. Engaging with your environment is instinctual.

If you’re in a bookstore, you’ll read books. If you’re at a shopping mall, you will spend money. If you’re at a bar, you will drink

If you’re with losers, you will lose. If you’re with winners, you will win.

Changing your life seems hard because you haven’t changed your environment.

 

  • Jason

    Beautifully said.

  • http://stagedreality.wordpress.com Leap of a Beta

    Yup.

    Can’t keep working your hustle if there’s nothing around you to hustle. Get off your ass and move.

  • Revo Luzione\

    This principle goes so deep, it’s beyond the comprehension of most individuals to understand how much our environment shapes us.

    Architect Mies Van Der Roeh said that “We create our environment and then our environment creates us.” This is radically true, in my experience, and nowhere more so than in your home space. If you want to draw or sketch, your art setup should be within reach, and it should be as simple as sitting down and picking up the pencil to begin.

    The same with food. If you want to juice, the juicer ideally would be kept clean, assembled, and ready to go on the counter, and the fridge would be brimming with washed, cut produce of the right size to go into the juicer. It should be nearly automatic.

    Want to ride your mountain bike at the trail after work? Make sure it’s in your vehicle with all your gear, ready to go.

    The same is true for eradicating negatiive habits. Stop eating junk food by not purchasing it and not keeping it in your house, car, or office, and instead keeping healthy foods nearby.

    This method has its limitations. I do my work on my computer, and it’s very easy to get off track on a web tangent. Still, you can replace habits. I stepwise eliminated my porn habit by switching from hardcore porn to more softcore, art porn, and then from there to written erotica. From there, it was easy to drop it, and I only occasionally have a relapse, and they are brief.

    Control and create your environment so you can sculpt yourself.

    Great post, Danger, this is in my mind one of the premiere spots in the manosphere due to your pragmatic, practical approach to lifestyle.

  • http://rivsdiary.wordpress.com/ rivsdiary

    “this is in my mind one of the premiere spots in the manosphere due to your pragmatic, practical approach to lifestyle.”

    exactly

    “Control and create your environment so you can sculpt yourself.”

    great summary.

  • playmuc

    Nah. I exercise a lot, I work a lot, I eat right, I enjoy life. I don’t buy crap in shopping malls, just because it’s there. Bang bang, in and out, I just get what I came for. I don’t touch the cookies even if they are on the table for days. And I never watch TV even though I have one. I feel like you could put me into a war prisoner camp and I’d still be having a good time.

    With the right lifestyle, a man gains the ability to enjoy himself in the worst of circumstances. And losers can’t put a dent into that man.

    I have to say this blog has been inspiring me to pursue my current lifestyle harder. But now it’s time to teach right back at you, danger and play. The environment doesn’t mean shit if the rest in your life is alright. I am sure you know that.

    • Revo Luzione

      Playmuc, your example is referred to as an “n=1.” Meaning your personal experience is valuable…to you. It’s a single data point. Whereas in the vast majority of humans, if you put them in close proximity to cookies, they’re going to eat them.

      Be proud of your personal discipline, but not all humans have as well a honed reward control system. Most other people need, and thrive upon, environmental cues for behavior. See Eric Barker’s blog (bakadesuyo.com) for more details, he has literally hundreds of posts gleaned from behavioral research.

      • playmuc

        Revo, that may be true, but we have a lifetime to work on ourselves. That’s the thing. I let myself go during my last long term relationship, I got fat and lazy. But then I worked on myself. And blogs like these (amongst many other things) at least show the benefits of not eating that cookie. I was just saying that if your core is strong, all that negative shit around you means less.

        • playmuc

          But in a way its right of course. For example reading blogs like this one is creating one’s own environment. Fade out the CNN and the crappy TV shows, read something positive instead. This was a choice though. So men should choose wisely what to do with their time.

  • 8===D
  • ASF

    It would stand to reason that if you want to get better with women, instead of trying to do it all by yourself you should try and hang out and be friends with guys who already are good with women. Learning curve will not be as steep I wager.

  • Joshua

    Another excellent blog post. In 2013, one of my primary goals is to move out of my small town and into a lively city where big things happen…

  • http://krauserpua.com Krauser

    “If you’re with losers, you will lose. If you’re with winners, you will win”

    This is very true.

  • Feldspar

    “The wise man will want to be ever with him who is better than himself.”
    —Plato

    This is why I started training jiu-jitsu.

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