“How Old Are You?”

A perennial question on places where mean concrete is the age-gap issue. Namely, “What do I say when she asks me how old I am?”

Well isn’t it funny that guys keep asking that question. Think about it. Why are you asking that question in the first place.

You’re asking that question because girls are suddenly interested in you. A man’s peak years to meet women are his late 20s to early 30s, and he can extend his time horizons through good nutrition, physical fitness, and hormone replacement therapy.

She’s asking you about your age because you look older and more mature. and that’s a good thing.

So first stop being so god-damned insecure about your age. In every other society younger women prefer older men.  Only in this god-forsaken culture are we taught that it’s “creepy” for an older man to date a younger woman.

Second, if she asks, always answer, “How old do you think I am?” She will guess. Younger women are horrible at judging age. Until a  woman develops crows feet and fine lines, she doesn’t know what signs of aging to look for in a man.

You say, “You’re a good guesser,” and grin. She will push. “Am I right?!” She wants to be told that she made the right guess, not so much because age is a deal breaker, but because women love to be right.

Play around with it for a little while before saying, “You were off by a year.” Then move on.

Third, some women are bitches. One woman said to me, “Oh, really, we’re going to play that game?” It’s no surprise that she was 31.  I turned away from her because I don’t talk to bitches.

Fourth, if a woman says your age is an issue, counter with, “Yeah, I know we won’t make it in the long run. I prefer dating sophisticated women.”

A girl will be on her back with her feet in the air to prove how wrong you are about her lack of sophistication and worldliness.

  • Shawn

    The shit tests come in many disguises. Basically never take it (women) seriously

  • KN

    “places where mean concrete”

    or should that be places where men congregrate? ;-)

  • http://thequestfor50.wordpress.com Dagonet

    Imagine if that 31-year-old became the mother of your child. Every time that kid cried or smiled or wanted to hear a bedtime story, this woman would act like a shrill bitch instead a warm, playful mother.

    That’s why her behavior is so repulsive. She has no femininity, and would make a horrible mother.

  • Wake

    I love answering:

    “I’m 232 years young”.

    Pause.

    “I’m quite inexperienced, even for a young vampire”.

    Let her stew in uncertainty.

  • http://whoism3.wordpress.com M3

    I’ve always told them to guess, by virtue of the fact that i was always carded until i was 25-27ish and am always told i look young for my age (when im wearing a hat)

    Course, if they highball it and go over, i feign righteous indignation and scoff at the suggestion, usually following with a raised eyebrow and a ‘Do i really look like the Crypt Keeper?”

    But you’re dead on about the age groups of women. The near 30 and up crowd usually zero in on me +-3 years. Teenyboppers and the freshly graduated always seem to miss by over 5+.

  • Jim

    I’m 41. Been told that I look like I’m in my early 30′s by women as young as 24 years old no less. I never give out my age and always keep them guessing.

  • Request

    Can you bring back the old format? Articles continuing instead of headers? And you don’t have to capitalize the first line. Can you also brighten the tweets? They’re so light and unreadable.

    • Danger & Play

      Yeah, I know it needs those tweaks. Thanks for the feedback. We’re on it.

  • Maxx

    Just tell her the truth

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  • meorhim

    the only answer should be “Old enough”

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  • rivsdiary

    great post. this one is better though:
    http://s6889.p20.sites.pressdns.com/lie-about-your-age/