Guys lose in relationships because they don’t understand that two games are being played. The game being played after you bang a girl is different from the one being played before you get the girl. Guys also don’t understand that women play the game far better than men.
Most guys don’t know how to meet women. The smart ones learn game. After banging one or two, to one or two dozen, a guy finds a cool chick he calls his girlfriend. Then the player gets played.
Guys, you must realize something. Your girl will deny it to you. She will even deny it to herself. It is nevertheless true.
Your girlfriend wants you to marry her.
Although women are generally the ones with short time horizons, thus being unable to stick to a commitment, it’s men who fail to see the relationship’s big picture. If you ask the guy what the “end game” of a relationship is, he will say, “Um, spend time together, have fun, have lots of sex, maybe take some trips together.” That short-term thinking will kill you.
The girlfriend, for decades, has been planning a wedding. By virtue of becoming a man’s girlfriend, the girl has signaled that she wants to marry her boyfriend. Women often begin planning their weddings after a good first date.
Soon enough, you’re another marriage chump who wonders: “What the fuck just happened?”
Here’s how it happened: The woman’s end game is, “Stay at home mom with two children living in a nice neighborhood two cars with a nanny and house keeper to manage the home.” Not every girl can get that, but that’s what they all want. Who’s going to pay for all of that? Who is going to get into debt paying for homes, nannies, and college funds?
A woman’s every move is a calculated stop, to bring you closer to an early death.
Of course it all starts out simple and practical enough. First, she makes herself seem so awesome that you agree to monogamy. She makes herself so fun to be around, that you’re seeing her every day.
After several months, she says, “Why are we paying separate rents? It’s not logical. We should use the money we’d save on rent, by moving in together, and spent in on vacations and an Xbox.” You may not want to move in with her, but it seems innocuous enough. Plus, it does seem logical.
You don’t understand what’s going on.
During normal decision-making, anchoring occurs when individuals overly rely on a specific piece of information to govern their thought-process. Once the anchor is set, there is a bias toward adjusting or interpreting other information to reflect the “anchored” information.
Going from, “Guy with a cool girlfriend” to “slave to job because wife and two children must be supported” is an extreme move. In fact, I’d wager that none of you reading this blog would make that move. You wouldn’t make that move because it’s too far from your current anchor.
As you make each move, your anchor changes. “Married with children” is still far from “cohabitation,” but remains much closer than “guy who can tell his girlfriend to get fucked when she throws a fit at his crib.”
To avoid losing the game, recognize the game she is playing. It has steps. You must delay each step from being taken.
Monogamous relationship —> “serious relationship” —> Meet parents —> Move in together —> “Make me an honest woman” —> “We need to share a symbol of our love”/”Ooops, I forgot to take my pill” —> … —> Debt Hell.
The single best way to avoid marriage hell is to avoid the traps. Never move in with her.